Alternate Title: You Can’t Take it With You
Goodbye cruel world. Or rather, in this case, goodbye awesome world located nicely within my comfort zone.
I am just about one month from leaving the states and nine days from leaving Florida. Leaving the sand. Leaving Disney World. Leaving the surf I never actually learned how to surf. Leaving Disney World. Leaving the sound of the rolling waves at night. Did I mention leaving Disney World?
I knew the goodbyes were coming. Rationally, I knew it. But when you have a bit of a crying breakdown at Carmax when you sell the only piece of property you’ve ever owned in your life, your silver Mustang, you know sh*t has gotten real.
Notice how I haven’t once discussed saying tearful goodbyes to actual people. Those are coming. I just can’t handle processing that now so I will, for now, make like a Material Girl and think only of inanimate objects. My car. My condo. The Main Mouse in my life.
You see, I have a hard time with impermanence. I see something cool, I want to make it a part of my life. My motto has always been Buy the Shoes. I move around a lot because I see a cool place and automatically want to make it my own and keep it forever and ever. The problem is, life just won’t cooperate with that kind of mentality. Most of the stuff and most of the places are just for rent, says life. We can keep it for a little while, but ultimately, it is our job to enjoy it while it is in our possession, but not to hold it so tightly that we miss other things and places.
To have this adventure, I am having to let go of some things and places I thought I would have forever. I am going to have to take one giant leap for mankind out of my comfort zone.
As the great (and often sassy) Mark Twain once said, “Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Find an area where there is no Chipotle and franchise. Explore. Dream. Discover. ” Ok, so that quote was semi adapted, but whatever. He would’ve liked it.
My point is, I have to find a way to both love what is in front of me and acknowledge the fact that it won’t always be in my life. In two years, when my contract is up, I could be sitting in my living room in Kuwait with empty bags ready to be filled, crying because I am leaving. I would never have gotten to that point without selling my car, leaving my beloved beach condo, and letting my Disney World annual pass go.
Impermanence is a b*tch, but I intend to make it my b*tch. Time for one more ride on the Hollywood Tower of Terror and one last gaze at that beautiful castle. Time for my last few walks along the Atlantic Ocean. Time for my last few Chipotle burritos.
Time for my first few steps into my next adventure.